I always say - if I am not with happy how I am, how I look, RIGHT NOW and it never changes, than I will waste years feeling like I am never enough. I have worked with many people in my practise, who have eating disorders and who are very hard themselves. I have even had clients that look like models, with even worse beliefs about what they should or should not eat and how they should or should not look. It saddened me deeply when I came upon a young woman's belief that everything she eats is bad.
It's not what we eat, it's how we feel about what we eat. Last night I got a decaf pumpkin spice latte. I was feeling unwell and wanted a treat. When I was done, I felt a little gross and guilty. I sat with that guilt and had a real moment with myself. I didn't dismiss it. I sat with why.
It's not what we look like, it's about we perceive ourselves when we look in the mirror and how we think others see us in the world. I have been standing naked in front of the mirror lately and giving myself love front and back side! I have been walking around the house naked too. I am not saying you have to do this to feel beautiful but things get real when we aren't decorated. I Give myself big hugs. I have noticed that since starting this my man is now more attracted to me. He definitely likes the walking around naked bit. I recently put on weight due an illness, and was feeling bad about it... I simply got real with myself, allowed myself to heal and stopped trying to fit into what I think I "should" look like. I am in my 40s and my body is going to change. I now approach eating and fitness from a much different place- which actually, I have been working on for years... more of a becoming conscious of and letting go of rules.
I feel that if one feels the need to constantly defend that they love themselves, how they look (albeit we need to express this every now and then to teach our youngins') it looks to me like they are defending- which I am hoping we will hopefully begin to move past as a culture. If we are good with how we look, how we eat and how act in the world, there is certainly no need to advertise or defend it again and again. Just be wicked and the confidence and strength will shine through in everything we do.
Stand a little taller in your space- stand strong, speak honestly, show yourself eating whatever the heck you want to. Smoke in public and don't hide it in photos... Be your goofy self. I am a ham and it's no secret. This is me. Tam-ham.
I used to hide all of this (when I entered into entrepreneur land and became visible again) and now I look at a photo and say: Oh look at my awesome double chin, look at my healthy voluptuous body, look at how freakin' happy I am. I am owning it. I am grateful. Really. Life is a blessing. May sound fluffy but that is how I feel. Sure, I might have a little pity party every now and then, but I get through it and celebrate the goods things more often now.
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Hi I'm Tammra
I live in Squamish, BC, Canada and I am uber passionate about holistic well-being, music, art and being playful. Want to know more about me- read my story here.